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UNSHAMING | the ‘Dark Feminine’, Active Surrender & Sexual Sovereignty


Dark feminine* is a part of our human expression which is connected to feeling deeply, allowing all emotions to run through the body. She is connected to the body's primal intelligence, sexuality and to eros. Through her deep gaze, she demands authenticity. She is has the capacity to create life and to destroy (what does not serve). She ‘conceives’, she is fertile, she births and through her blood she lets whatever is to die to die. It is a part of human expression that has been shamed, suppressed and distorted.


This is the story of a woman I worked with, on her way to meet the ‘Dark feminine’ inside of her and finding her power through this journey.




‘I want to learn how to surrender deeper. I want to feel free and safe in my body, in myself, as a woman, a lover, as a soul in a body. I want to be able to trust myself, my body and how life unfolds through me’ she said the first time we met…

The ‘jumps’ that she chose to make throughout the 3-months of journeying together were huge! Yet in our last session, I could still feel the crust of something really old… something that if she chose to ‘own’, there would be no way back in therms of her relationship to her power and sexuality.


She shared that she had a fear of entering her own vagina whiles self pleasuring, something 'common' that I come across quite often in my work.

So I asked

‘Am I hearing well that you trust other people to enter your vagina but you don’t trust your self? There is a difference between surrendering and passivity, so am I hearing that you feel more comfortable being passive rather than OWNING YOUR POWER? Am I right in saying that you are scared of your power?

Her eyes opened as wide as the eyes of an owl … After a few seconds she shared that she is aware that she is scared of her power, another 'common' thing resulting form our social conditioning). She shared that she could now see the LINK between owning her POWER and owning her sexuality and her pleasure