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"INSTINCTUAL WHISPERS OF NESTING": Preparing for Optimal Birthing and Parenthood

pregnant woman

‘Nesting’ is really something that calls for preparation of, not only, the nest or home in order to make space and include another new being, but also a preparation for optimal physiological birthing and building the foundations of parenthood.

Zooming out and observing how I have been functioning during the last month or so, keeps me in fascination. In all (interconnected) dimensions of my being; physical, spiritual, emotional, mental, I’ve been guided by the awakening instincts of motherhood…

Mammals (including humans), birds, insects are wired for nesting; yet in the human experience, this often only falls under or realised through, preparing the ‘nursery’ and the clothes of the new baby, buying strollers, car seats etc.

My nesting time also included the above, yet giving voice to the intrinsic happenings of my instinct, feels profound and makes the invisible more tangible.


🐆 Every time I leave the ‘nest’ I feel an increased sensation of ‘alertness’ that makes me want to finish what I need to do fast so I return back to base as soon as possible!

🐆 My nervous system gets overstimulated at the speed of light by sensory input, which previously seemed insignificant, such as the view of cars moving around, sounds - any sounds other than nature - the presence of more than a handful of people or people which cannot ‘read’ my state and respond, small talk (well, i’ve always had low tolerance to that), unfamiliar places…

It is the primal requirement for SAFETY, for birth to happen, that calls for this ‘nesting’. Safety is not only a mental construct of ‘what is safe’, but also a deeply neurological and hormonal EXPECTATION of the human female system, in order to function optimally!
My partner Michael and I co-regulating our newnervous systems

🐆 I feel a deeper sensation of emotional ‘rest’ when my partner is at home, especially at night. This doesn’t come from a space of neediness or fear. It is something so subtle, yet notable, that I am experiencing for the first time! It is a layer that signifies the dance between two humans who have created life together.

When I zoom out, I recognise, yet another instinctual, deeply primal whisper. Beyond social interpretations of roles for ‘men’ and ‘women’,‘feminine’ or ‘masculine’... Our nervous systems have been building bridges and preparing TOGETHER for this birth!

We have different roles yet both are important and reciprocal. This twining of interdependence creates the foundation for parenthood. The dance goes as such; I feel safer because he is wired to be the protector of our nest… He is field with courage and an enhanced sense of purpose because of my increased nurturing behaviour…

(Heads up for single mothers or fathers, I am not sure how I could have managed this without my partner)!

🐆 My body got heavier and heavier and demands of me to slow WAY down. Then, all of a sudden, I feel a burst of primal energy that fuels me to nurture and ‘cosy-fy’ the nest and have everything ready for birth, baby and my postpartum sanctuary.

🐆 There is a profound, unconditional giving of ‘my time’ to the things that are necessary to happen for our little one’s arrival; washing clothes, making his closet, cleaning, making space in the house… There is another new human that is coming into our life and he doesn’t only need love, he needs ‘things’ which need time and energy to materialise.

Yet it happens so naturally; there is no separation between the instinctual impulse and the action itself; there is no separation between ‘I am doing this for me right now’ or I am doing it for him / because of him…

There is no measuring…

I let myself to be taken...

And this is just the beginning

I am excited to soon cross the bridge of BIRTH into motherhood.

🖤 Stefanie

P.S. If you are feeling overwhelmed, your nervous system is on fire, or have frequent emotional release episodes during your pregnancy (especially towards the end), know that it’s ABSOLUTELY NORMAL! Your whole system is preparing you for one thing; to birth and nurture your baby!

If you need support in navigating this journey and being held in your process or understand what is going on, I am happy to help!

Reach out to arrange a FREE DISCOVERY CALL or check out my work 👇🏼.


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